Mama's Do Not Fret

As I watch the three loverly's grow I am posed with a conundrum. In one year, the average child learns to suck from the breast or a bottle, drink from a cup, sip from a straw. He also masters eating solids, rolling over, sitting up, crawling, walking and clapping. More over babies can understand directions, recognize faces, shapes, colors, numbers, letters and speak.

Everett is now nine months. He now has his two upper front teeth. He took his first step last week and now believes he can run. He is a boy who knows what he wants. I was feeding him one night. He did not want anymore solids. He wanted his bottle. So he picked up the food and threw it of his tray. Today we were going on an outing. Not thinking, Stephen put Everett's car seat in the car facing forward. Everett loved it. Unfortunately I had to turn the seat around. Everett went nuts. He was not happy about having to be turned around and let me know about it.

Mason is four and a half and I am amazed at how smart he is. He is always catching things I miss. Our thing lately is Star Wars Legos. There have been times I could not figure out where we were supposed to go or what to do but he got it. Once I sat in his class at church and the teacher asked him a question and he knew it. I was shocked.

Adelin on the other hand, well she is too busy being a two year old with hormones right now. But I am surprised at how well she speaks. She has used big words since she started talking. The week before she turned two I realized I had been treating her as if she were older. She is tall for her ago speaks like a five year old and actively can keep up with Mason doing just about anything.

Granted I remember many times I thought I knew what I was doing and luckily I had a mom to step in and redirect me. When I am dealing with my own little ones I cannot count how many times I have thought, what in the world are you doing. You should know better. However, there are plenty of adults I would ask the same questions to.
Being a mom is one of the most challenging jobs I have undertaken. With so many books on the subject you would think we moms and dads would have it all figured out. Problem is the majority of experts writing those books focus on the average child and do not take into account the differences of personality. After spending hundreds of dollars to help me figure out why my kids were slightly different from the other kids they played with and not getting anywhere I got the best advice you can get. It was free and from experienced moms.

I want to enjoy being around my kids and I want others to enjoy being around them. We have tried to instill in them basic courtesies. They know please and thank you. Do not hit. Do not bit. Be gentle to the cat. Share your toys. Do not jump on the couch. Do they always stay within the bounds? No, of course not, they are kids. They like to test the waters and they like to do it when we least expect it. It is our job to constantly be one step ahead of them. So we arm ourselves with what we know and the lessons learned by others and hope for the best.

That was where I was three years ago. I felt like I was failing miserably. Nothing worked. I tried reading books. I tried watching the Nanny shows. I talked with friends. My son was getting angrier and acting out even more. I was running out of consequences. His toys were gone. There was nothing left in his room but a bed. Why the answer is never there before we reach the dead end eludes me. I was at a friend’s house pouring out my frustrations. She mentioned she had the same struggles with finding consequences and offered to let me borrow a book that helped her. I did not want to scoff in her face. I doubted another book written by another so called expert would be any help. Politely, I accepted the book. That night I flipped through it. The following day I had finished reading the entire book. It was exactly what I was searching for. I admit I was completely overwhelmed at first. Yet, to my surprise there was a completely different kid living with us after a few days of implementing the strategies taught in the book.

After some observation I made an alarming discovery. My child was not only 100% all natural certified “boy”, but he is a sensitive and spirited child.